My husband Bryan and I found each other on a beach volleyball court.

What started as something playful quickly revealed itself to be something deeper.

There was an immediate recognition — grounded and electric at the same time.

And alongside that…

I was grieving the loss of my first husband.

Love and loss were happening simultaneously.

Intensity wasn’t something I could avoid.

I had to learn how to be with it.

Like many people, I met this through growth.

I worked on my reactions.
I learned how to communicate.
I took responsibility for what was mine.

But without realizing it, I was also managing.

Trying to fix.
Trying to guide.
Trying to create safety by controlling the experience.

Over time, it became exhausting.

Not because the work was wrong…

But because something deeper was missing.

What changed everything wasn’t more strategy.

It was learning how to return to my body.

Through embodiment, polarity, and eventually tantra, I began to understand:

Aliveness isn’t created by intensity.

It’s created by the capacity to stay present inside it.

I didn’t need to remove intensity from my life.

I needed to expand my ability to hold it.

At the same time, Bryan began doing his own work — developing his capacity for presence, leadership, and energetic awareness.

And our dynamic shifted.

Not because we fixed the relationship.

But because we changed how we met intensity.

The volleyball court remained our greatest teacher.

What most people avoid — pressure, mistakes, competition —
became the place we practiced.

It revealed everything:

-how we handled tension
-how we repaired
-how we led and followed
-how quickly we left our bodies

It became a relational laboratory.

A place where patterns couldn’t hide.

Only be seen — and transformed.

What became clear...

Over time, the same patterns showed up everywhere.

In individuals.
In teams.
In couples.

Different people.

Same dynamics.

Most people believe their relationships are the problem. But the real issue is simpler. They don’t know how to stay present when intensity rises. They confuse activation for aliveness. They manage connection instead of inhabiting it.

What I teach is built on a decade of living this — not as theory, but as practice.

The Devotional Relationship Method™ trains three capacities:

-recognize your state
-re-orient your state
-stay devoted to that state under pressure

This is what changes everything.

Not by controlling outcomes.

But by transforming how you meet what arises.